Jellef

That Girl with the Pen

Friend zoned and he wants more!

Letter to a friend,

This is straight from the heart, my dearest friend. I am on break at my lousy job, you know the one where I yell ‘Power off now sir, ma’am” and I thought I would take these fifteen minutes to tell you how much I miss you. There are several reasons why I miss you, but the most important one is the intellectual conversations we used to have. Once upon a time, you were the one I inboxed whenever I had a thought on which I needed the most resourceful person, the most eloquent, well learned, walking encyclopaedia, information online and offline.

 

You get the gist, you were the one person that challenged me intellectually, and made me believe in myself, and in my intellectual prowess. I was deluded by our association, to the extent that I began to see myself as a genius, because I could respond to your wonderful banter, two people of the same intellect you know, Never mind that I know you are way wiser than me because of the salt that you have eaten and the books that you have devoured. You made me feel like an equal, brainwise (making up a word).

 

Anyway, many years into our friendship I miss you deeply. I no longer inbox you. I am scared to inbox you. And I miss you so much. The reason I no longer inbox you is because every conversation turns into an innuendo on our sexual compatibility and the things you would love to do to me with your tongue, with your equipment, how you would love to hold me and feel me, etc. And it’s uncomfortable for me, because I truly look up to you as an academic giant. I want to retain you as my best friend. The one that I can run to and unload and cry on your shoulders when I am in deep shit or the American corporate is not working for me, or life in general is just incomprehensible, you know how lonely this place can get.

 

Forgive me for putting this out here, but I was afraid to inbox you. How can I recover our friendship? Our mutual respect? I am flattered that you desire me, that you want me, that you think I am hot, that you crave me, but I want to be your friend at an intellectual level. I want you to make me feel like a genius again, if that makes sense. For that’s what I lack most right now. Is this at all possible?

 

Lemme know…dearest friend.

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